"About being able to fit in, about being able to cope. All the teachers expect me to be good at school, to know things! They give homework in a way that we never got on the Isle! Doc F. never cared if we did anything so long as we listened when he felt like lecturing and kept him in bribes. The only teacher who really made us do anything at all was Lady Tremane. And we only worked on nasty little plots, evil schemes. Sure sh taught history but she shouted it and ranted it at us, she didn't expect us to go home and read pages and pages and pages of it! Mother Gothel got mad at us if we showed up less than a half hour late to her class! Our homework was taking photos. Of ourselves, or her! But everyone here gives homework and homework and homework! And every time I tried to turn there were people in my face demanding to know about mom, about our relationship, about my hair, my clothes. I don't have a moment to breathe, Ben! Even using magic to help!"
She was going too fast to stop now.
"I had to find out from everyone else that you asking me to cotillion meant you were practically proposing to me, Ben! That's the kind of thing I'd want to learn from you! Not everyone else! But when could you have even told me? When do we ever have time? And then we finally have a date but I'm so turned around that I got mixed up and couldn't do what I promised you! And you give me so much and I want to be able to do things for you too but I can't! I try and I try and I can't! Not without magic! And even with magic I can't keep up! But everyone else seems to manage! So clearly it is me, something is wrong with me!" Her eyes started glowing green and she put her hands over her head, trying to hold herself together, trying to fight the anxiety, trying very hard not to change into a dragon as she had in Diatu.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2023-06-19 12:52 am (UTC)She was going too fast to stop now.
"I had to find out from everyone else that you asking me to cotillion meant you were practically proposing to me, Ben! That's the kind of thing I'd want to learn from you! Not everyone else! But when could you have even told me? When do we ever have time? And then we finally have a date but I'm so turned around that I got mixed up and couldn't do what I promised you! And you give me so much and I want to be able to do things for you too but I can't! I try and I try and I can't! Not without magic! And even with magic I can't keep up! But everyone else seems to manage! So clearly it is me, something is wrong with me!" Her eyes started glowing green and she put her hands over her head, trying to hold herself together, trying to fight the anxiety, trying very hard not to change into a dragon as she had in Diatu.